flaws and all

A few days ago I was reading one of my favorite blogs Damsel in Dior and I came across this post. I immediately fell in love with Jacey's ability to admit her flaws and insecurities and share them with her readers. It made me fall in love with her and her blog even more. More than that though, it really got me thinking. I was inspired to do my own post on my own flaws and insecurities. Reading her post helped me realize that I'm not the only one in the world with a list of flaws a mile long and insecurities to boot. It also helped me realize that I am my own worst enemy and critic (as my mom has told me many times before) and that I need to stop putting so much pressure on myself. Without further ado, here's my take on Jacey's post and I want to say a big thank you to her for inspiring me. 

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So, where do I begin? I'm insecure about a lot of things. A lot of things. I've never been a secure or confident person. I critique myself to no end and I can be quite negative towards myself. I'll start with the fact that I don't feel pretty. Never really have. There are times when I feel like I might be, but the true feeling is never really there. I don't like the way my top lip gets super thin when I smile. Actually I kind of hate that. Sometimes I feel like I have a big forehead, but that could just be my imagination. Other than that, my face isn't the thing that haunts me at night. In my eyes, I have much bigger problems.

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 Should I talk about the fact that I've felt constantly compared to others my whole life or the fact that sometimes I feel like a big fat blob? I've never felt good enough in way or even that I was lovable. I have a lower tummy pooch that makes me feel disgusting at times and no matter what I do, my thighs, hips, and butt just won't disappear. My arms jiggle and I hate that. I also have flat feet. I kind of hate that too. My body has never been something that I've been proud of. It's given me the most trouble, but oddly enough, it's not something that I obsess over. You see, I've gotten pretty good at faking confidence. 

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Internally, I don't feel like I'm that bad. Sure, I can hold a grudge like nobody's business. Yeah, I'm a bit of a negative Nancy and I'm a bit moody. I'm incredibly shy. I always assume the worst and I always jump to conclusions. Did I mention that it's hard for me to see other people's point of view? I'm a worrier and I always have been. I'm easily stressed out and that's what does haunt me at night. Oh, and I'm the world's best complainer and I've got the whole putting myself down thing down pat. I've been hurt and used more times than I can count. People always seem to think it's a good idea to take advantage of me. I'd be an idiot not to fear the damage that has done to me. I'm a real winner. 

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I'm pretty sure I could go on and on. Those are just some of my flaws, but going over everything I'm insecure about is not really the purpose of this post. There are some pretty amazing things about myself that I am proud of. I consider myself to be a giving person. I'm always willing to give and I do it out of the kindness of my heart. I'm a smart person. I'm helpful. I'm cautious. I'm dependable and responsible, I'm loyal to a fault. I think that's the Taurus in me. I'm also thoughtful, compassionate, and empathetic. There's a heart in me somewhere. 

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I love the quote "once you've accepted your flaws no one can use them against you." There's nothing anyone can say about me that I haven't already said about myself. You can call me fat (and people have). Well, I've already called myself that. Ugly. I pretty much think that about myself anyway. See, you can't use my flaws against me. I'm already aware of them. That being said, my flaws don't run my life. I'm actually a happy person. I don't sit and think about everything that's wrong about me all of the time. If I did that, I would seriously go crazy. In Jacey's post she talked about being her own worst enemy and that is so true for me. Like I said, I'm my own worst critic and no one can do that better than me. The battles I fight are internal. 

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I hope that by reading this post, you realized that everyone has insecurities and flaws and it's okay. What's not okay is to obsess over them and let them run your life. I am proud of who I am and the person I am becoming. I am happy to embrace my flaws because they make me unique. Let's try not to be so hard on ourselves ladies. "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."

*Update I wasn't sure if I should post this because I didn't want it to seem like I was complaining. I'm not complaining. Like I said, I'm happy with who I am and I'm happy with the flaws that make me unique. I'm striving everyday to be a better person.

a dose of inspiration: DON'T GIVE UP!

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One of my goals with this blog is to not only share my personal style (which I love doing), but to share my life with you all. I want this to be a place of inspiration and inspiration comes in many forms. I want you all to know me, know that I am a real person with real problems. Today's dose of inspiration stems from some recent problems I've had in my life (and are still having to this day). It's been a difficult few weeks for my family and I. I won't go into too much detail, but life has really been trying to knock me down. I've come close to just giving up, but I didn't. Somewhere in me is an amazing strength that I have been blessed with. It would have been so easy to just give up, to say I'm done, but I didn't. I'm saying all of this because whatever it is that you may be going through in life, no matter how big or small the situation is, I want to encourage you to never give up. Never lose hope and faith. I want you to know that you can get through this. Follow your dreams and remember that you can do anything that you put your mind to. Life isn't always easy and it sure isn't always fair, but you have been given this life because you are strong enough to live it. 

I also want to thank all of you for reading. This blog is such a dream come true for me and I have developed a strong passion for it. Blogging doesn't feel like work for me. I enjoy it that much. Some days I do want to give up, because I feel like I should be here or there by now. But if I can inspire one person, then it's worth it. I'm going to keep blogging about the things I love and I hope you all will continue reading. Enjoy these quotes and I hope they inspire you to just keep going. It will be worth it, I promise.

Here's to never giving up, no matter what.

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Weekly Roundup

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It's been a busy week for The JaToya Chronicles. I'm not sure how I did it (or how I had time for it) but I managed to post everyday this week and twice on Wednesday. I'm really proud of myself, but as the quote above says, there's no such thing as being too busy, if you truly want something you'll make time for it. That's so true for me and this blog. I want it, so I make time for it. Enough rambling, let's get to the roundup.

Monday: A very casual outfit was posted. I love this look because I don't feel like getting dressed up every single day. 

Tuesday: I talked about my favorite fall lipsticks. This was such a fun post for me because I love my lipsticks. What are some of your favorite ones?

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Wednesday: I talked about hurting someone intentionally and an incident that happened with my sister. I also did the Liebster Award tag which was so much fun. I got a lot of great comments from you all as well. 

Thursday:  I talked about my love for black pants and posted a look that I love. 

Friday: I posted another outfit that I love featuring a tribal print shirt. Oh and my favorite sandals ever!

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Saturday: I posted a quick thank you for all your lovely comments. I truly thank you all and I'm excited to keep blogging. I'm having a blast.

That's it for this week's roundup. I know it was pretty long, but make sure to catch up on any post you may have missed this week. As always, I'll be back tomorrow with an all new post. See you then!